Perspective on the Parable of the Prodigal Son

Most of us have heard the story of the prodigal son from Luke 15. Superficially it is a story about greed, shortsightedness and then humility, and one most people feel they don't identify with.  It is the stories like this which make me realize when I speak with someone who has "read the Bible" and it was nothing more than a history book, I know they did not read the Bible with the influence of the Holy Spirit. As I reviewed this chapter in Luke again this morning, the Holy Spirit revealed still more to me despite the numerous sermons I have heard on the topic over the years. Some of what I am about to share is sharing previous revelation from sermons, but there were several salients points brought to my attention as well that I wish to share.

In verse 12 we read the younger of two brothers approaches their father and says I would really like to have my inheritance now (basically so he can enjoy it before HE becomes an old man). What he is really saying to his dad is "I wish you were dead NOW so I could have what is coming to me." Wow- what a sentiment to a father whom has loved and nurtured him in great comfort!

But notice the father does not rebuke him, try to persuade him otherwise or decline him. Rather, he divides his wealth between the two brothers.  Notice also the father does not weep for his son despite the ugliness he received from his youngest son.  I think this is because the father knew his son's heart and he would soon run through all his wealth because he was prodigal and had no foresight of the future. A reckless child, if you will. I think he knew the son would be destitute and back home soon.

Once the impertinent youth ventures from the rural area where life is relatively inexpensive and he goes to a big city, he lives an apparent life of partying and fool-hardiness to satisfy his heart. Soon, the money gone and severe famine bring this young man to his knees. Starving, he accepts a job feeding pigs garbage and refuse, or slop.

If you have ever been around slop, you know how vile it smells, and knowing Jesus is talking to Jews, the lowest form of animal is a pig, we get a sense of just how desperate a situation the prodigal son is in. He soon realizes these animals are eating better than him, even his father's slaves have it better off than him so it is not a hard decision to finally admit in humility the error of his ways and beg forgiveness of his father so he might be a lowly slave.

In other words, the son has NO idea just how much his father loves him, and the depths of his forgiveness for his son.

As the son approaches home from afar, the father sees him and is so overcome with joy that his lost son is now home what does he do? He RUNS to the son.  Again, realizing this is to a Jewish audience, the significance of his running is not lost on Jesus' audience. What it illustrates is the dignity of an elder Jewish man running, like a little boy, to bring his son to comfort and embrace him is an extremely powerful analogy of course to how much our Father rejoices when we turn our back on our prodigal lives and return to His embrace.

The son begs forgiveness and asks to be put to work, but alas, the father will have none of it! A robe is given him, a ring and sandals, and then a calf is sacrificed for a great party in the son's return. Symbolically that means there is a party when a child accepts the Kingdom and the blood of Jesus.

Meanwhile, the elder son is so busy with his works, he does not even notice his own flesh and blood returning. He is so focused doing what he thinks is right he fails to rejoice in this victory of his father. Instead, his pride makes him angry and will not permit him to enter the feast to honor his brother's return.

I must admit, I can certainly identify with this visceral reaction of the flesh. I have been wronged by believer and non-believer alike, and the flesh wants revenge but the Holy Spirit thankfully whispers to me to let it go and love nonetheless. (He is also kind enough to remind me I have offended others) which certainly helps me manage the bitter taste in my mouth.

But what the sons says next is quite revealing to me. He confronts his father and says I have "slaved" here while my brother has partied, yet you never gave me so much as a goat to enjoy with my friends."

REALLY? I'm sorry, sir, but I believe just a few short verses ago you inherited 2/3 of your father's wealth, and have continued to work it. While he may want to use the example of "like a slave" to describe his efforts, I submit that is the responsibility of a landowner. He is sustaining his wealth and livelihood by working. His pride has blinded him, making him feel he is the better son and more deserving of the father's love and adoration. I am so thankful my God does not think that way! It shows the imperfection of our flesh

But as always, there is more. He clearly missed how much HIS father loved him because he felt HE should have been recognized for doing his job! His responsibility as the eldest is to work the land and livestock! He is angry in his heart because his father never thanked him for what he had done or for his loyalty. I wonder, just how many times did he thank his father for the love and comfort he enjoyed?That is to say, the eldest sought recognition for his works!

He was not doing his works for the right reason- he was doing it out of duty and not faith.  This is where I think many of us are prodigal ourselves. We often get mired in a worldly situation and lose control of ourselves and find us behaving, at least in one manner or another, like the prodigal son. Yet the Almighty Father welcomes us with open arms every time we turn our back on the world and look to Him. The sooner we do that and realize the depth of His love for each and everyone of us, the sooner we will realize and experience this love. The eldest son obviously led a life not nearly as fulfilled as God intended, but because he was focused on his efforts and not on the Lord, he missed out on so many blessings.

So I ask in closing, which son was truly lost? How many blessings are waiting for you right now?

Forgiveness first requires the wound to be addressed

Before a splinter wound can begin healing, the infection must first be treated.

Watching a terrific sermon on forgiveness today, a real-world illustration helped me better understand a basic tenet of Christianity that many of us believers may not fully understand how to process or to completely forgive someone for their transgression against us.

I know from a personal standpoint I may have "forgiven"someone in the past but never really addressed, or processed what happened, how I felt about it and how I would move forward. As a result, the usual human reaction of "I will forgive but not forget" rears it's head and I may say I "forgive" but without fully addressing the underlying issue, am I truly forgiving the other person?

Consider the illustration above. By design, the human body rejects an offending foreign object like a splinter. The process begins with anti-bodies surrounding the site to mitigate infection. From there, the body starts to reject the foreign object to the surface, or encapsulate it in scar tissue. Now if we were to put a bandage on top of the splinter wound, we would cover it up, but the pain will still be there and will continue to be sensitive as the wound festers. Our first reaction is to simply bandage the wound but that is only a superficial treatment.  Below the surface is where the real offense lies and that is where it needs to be addressed.

By bandaging the wound, we are in effect, only covering something up rather than getting to the root of the matter. However, if we dig in and take hold of that splinter and remove it, the healing process can begin immediately and the pain from the infection is dramatically reduced. The human body can now naturally heal itself from the inside out.

In other words, in my estimation, until I fully engage the who, what and why of what offended me, my forgiveness is only superficial, can continue to cause pain and not permit me to process, forgive and move on as Jesus has done for me.

A lack of Grace: 5 Things we can Learn When Someone Expects Perfection in us

Learn from the past and quickly leave it there
to look to the future

When we seek or expect perfection in others we encounter in life we set ourselves up for disappointment and the other person for failure. This past week a customer made that abundantly clear to me.

As an internet or e-commerce director, my responsibility is to drive my store's profitability through a digital medium: To put our best foot forward through a customer's perspective via our website, email communication or the phone. A basic part of the email standpoint is to use effective email directly to each individual per their inquiry (basically to ensure we answer any question a potential customer may have given us) or to use a mass emailing to elicit a response. Mass emailing must be targeted unless I want to run the risk of a high opt-out rate which would lead to ISP's or Internet Service Providers like Yahoo!, MSN and AOL to view our IP address as a SPAM generator.  This I do and have done for years. In fact, I have probably sent out more than 500,000 emails in my career to prospective and current customers. This week was much the same as any other communication.

For those of you in a position of responsibility, you know you have many distractions- your people, contemporaries, supervisors, owners, manufacturers, customers, your daily process, etc., etc., etc.  In other words, MANY distractions. For those of you who are not supervisors, you have many distractions as well: Life, home, friends, etc. I am no different.

With the Christmas holiday right around the corner and then the end of the year next, I had been aiming to send out a mass email to our unsold prospects, and had been trying all day to get it written and compiled before it was too late in the day on Monday the 23rd of December. Unfortunately, I had been unable to complete this task due to many distractions until around 4:00 that afternoon. Long after I knew people would be reading this email at their morning break at work.

A couple of hours later, I received a very threatening voice mail on my mobile phone that if I wanted "my side of the story" to be heard on a "national article about the dealership" and to be named in it myself, I was to call back before the end of the night.  I normally don't do well when people try to threaten me- after having been under direct fire before words have little effect in causing me any anxiety. Out of managerial duty and curiosity I returned the call and the person confirmed it was him- we shall call him Larry.

Larry started on a line of questioning like he was an attorney so I was quickly on the guard, and I asked him what he in fact did for a living. He informed me he writes articles for national magazines like Time and such. Terrific.

I asked how I could help him and he started to tell me how I had lied to him. Okay sir, you now have my attention.

"How did I do that to you?" I asked.

"By emailing me that I had previously made an inquiry by email to buy a car.  I had not had I?"

"No sir, you did not. I see you were in for service previously, and had not made an inquiry about a purchase. That was my mistake."

But he persisted and again said I lied to him. I told him I had made a mistake and it was an oversight for which I held myself responsible.

The third time he called me a liar I pushed back hard. "THAT is enough!" I said. "You will not call me a liar again. I have owned up to the mistake, I have apologized repeatedly, what more can I do? What more do you want from me?"

It was at that exact moment I realized I was being attacked by evil. God had given me the patience and words to endure this withering assault against my character, my store, my job and my family.

His mood instantly changed and we spent the next 30 minutes talking about his experiences while photographing various topics. I viewed his website and some of his images and I couldn't help but think to myself "I'm the liar?" Every one of his photos were no doubt photographed with high performance SLR cameras with filters to capitalize and emphasize the lighting. Perhaps even digital manipulation.

In other words, every one of those photographs, as they were depicted, never truly happened.  Ironic.

I even went on to edify him, lauding his vast experience and accomplishments, and thanked him for his insight and bringing this to my attention. I don't think he knew quite what to do.

After hanging up I was quite upset, not quite angry, but still shaken. Surprisingly, I was not nearly as agitated as I would have ordinarily been.

When my GM came in the following day, I knew he was going to be calling the customer back so I gave him back-fill from my experience and he just smirked, shaking his head.  He went on to tell me how this "gentleman" came to be our customer.

He had come in just a couple of days before I started in August, and complained about how he was not treated well with two of our competitive stores, one of which has written a book on customer service. He had come in for a major service and insisted on meeting the mechanics whom would be working on his car. Not a bad idea.

Bending over backwards to earn his business, Ken asked the customer if our manufacturer had offered him any sort of coupon for his experience and he said no, they had not. So Ken then directs the service department to sell the service at cost for him.  Then right in front of Ken, this person pulls out a $500 coupon from the manufacturer and hands it to the service writer.

"Wait, I thought you said they didn't give you a coupon" my GM asked him.

"Oh yeah, well, I bitched a little more and they sent me one. I just want to get the best deal possible."

No, you just wanted to lie and steal from a company in the auspices of good faith.

This made me even angrier than I was before. A low-life scum bag like this accuses ME of lying. Someone who has never amounted to much of anything, probably never will, trying to pull someone else down to make himself feel better. His inflated resume is just that- inflated. Surely someone whom has contributed to TIME magazine for example would rank somewhere in search results, but no. The ONLY references I could find for him were the aforementioned website of his and an introductory page about him on an equine-focused website.

It is clear this person is devoid of a moral compass and peace. He is clearly hurting and probably doesn't know why. All I can do is forgive him and pray for him.

Some lessons to take from this encounter:

1. Hurting people hurt other people. 
2. The more someone tells you how great they are, the less likely it is they have accomplished anything they are building up in your mind.
3. Liars think other people lie. (Or at least think sales people will sit quietly and take it)
4. God extends us grace though we do not deserve it. Some people expect perfection from others and extend no grace. Perhaps they enjoy seeing the other person fail or they are purposely creating an environment to exploit to their advantage.
5. Even when confronted with a situation like this, with His word and guidance, a Christian can defend themselves AND not destroy the other person with their spoken word.