Forgiveness first requires the wound to be addressed

Before a splinter wound can begin healing, the infection must first be treated.

Watching a terrific sermon on forgiveness today, a real-world illustration helped me better understand a basic tenet of Christianity that many of us believers may not fully understand how to process or to completely forgive someone for their transgression against us.

I know from a personal standpoint I may have "forgiven"someone in the past but never really addressed, or processed what happened, how I felt about it and how I would move forward. As a result, the usual human reaction of "I will forgive but not forget" rears it's head and I may say I "forgive" but without fully addressing the underlying issue, am I truly forgiving the other person?

Consider the illustration above. By design, the human body rejects an offending foreign object like a splinter. The process begins with anti-bodies surrounding the site to mitigate infection. From there, the body starts to reject the foreign object to the surface, or encapsulate it in scar tissue. Now if we were to put a bandage on top of the splinter wound, we would cover it up, but the pain will still be there and will continue to be sensitive as the wound festers. Our first reaction is to simply bandage the wound but that is only a superficial treatment.  Below the surface is where the real offense lies and that is where it needs to be addressed.

By bandaging the wound, we are in effect, only covering something up rather than getting to the root of the matter. However, if we dig in and take hold of that splinter and remove it, the healing process can begin immediately and the pain from the infection is dramatically reduced. The human body can now naturally heal itself from the inside out.

In other words, in my estimation, until I fully engage the who, what and why of what offended me, my forgiveness is only superficial, can continue to cause pain and not permit me to process, forgive and move on as Jesus has done for me.